please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
