How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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