how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
