doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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