Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
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