I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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