But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
grandma shit on top of the toilet
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
