Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
