The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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