Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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