i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
