He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
