How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Randomize
