we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
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