would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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