she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Randomize