I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
