i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
