I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
