ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
What did we do last night that was yellow?
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize
