Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
