So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
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