If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Randomize
