I can't watch pbs sober anymore
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize