I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
