Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Randomize