At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
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