What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Randomize