Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
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