called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
