I wish I could teleport
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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