Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
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