We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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