I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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