Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
