i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
It's shark week go big or go home
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I wear drunk well.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
