So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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