she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Randomize
