Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize
