today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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