All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
Randomize