I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
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