i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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