Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
