woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize