I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize