Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
