JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
