Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
