How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
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